Relationships

How Presence, Not Presents, Changed My Life

Often times, we are shrouded in our own thoughts and stuck with an inability to move forward. I’ve felt this at times and feel it’s especially present when writing or speaking when you seem to be at a loss for words. You consider many factors before you plot your next move thinking maybe I should change the tonality in my voice or maybe I should write in a more professional tone or you know what, maybe I should remain silent until someone else brings up another topic.

Self-doubt is not thinking you are lesser than people, but being stuck in what to do next, whether that’s personally, professionally, or socially. It’s what I attribute in part to the rise of our lives becoming more and more digital and online based. We see the flawless pictures others post and the rich and lavish lifestyles some adhere to and wonder what exactly we’re doing that’s so different than those individuals.

One step of realizing this is understanding your fixations. Just like tobacco and alcohol, addiction cannot be noted quickly by ones own self, but rather can be from others around you. The desire to take a puff or another swig is a tick. This doesn’t mean you’re addicted, but rather your mind is at ease when you’re able to partake in it. One of the ticks I realized I had was my phone. I am all about self-improvement but found my eyes straining just from the amount of time I spent on my phone. Our world is digital now and our focus is on the things that provide us a safety net from reality. It’s so easy to scroll through Instagram and then reach your last point and go to the next platform. The cyclical nature of this is calming because it doesn’t require thinking. Unfortunately, this is just as addictive as any of the things listed above. It’s a heightened sense of dopamine that injects into your mind providing happiness short term.

Now I won’t say stop looking at your phone or delete the apps that cause you to stare for hours on end because that’d be foolish. I want you to keep enjoying your life and everything you do. Rather, what I want for you is to be cognizant of when your fully invested and present in a situation. Oblivious to distraction or personal issues and being involved in what is actively going on around you.

Once I slowly started making this shift, I realized that being invested in the moment and fully submerging myself into every situation gave me a sense of a much more profound feeling of joy. I implore you to be present in every moment and although at first it can be taxing on yourself and exhausting to not look at your phone or fall victim to your tick, in the long run it will make friendships stronger, memories far fonder, and life a whole lot more interesting.

Wishing you all an amazing day and as always,

 

“There is no such things as strangers, just friends we’ve yet to meet.”

Brant

A Message To All Mothers

This may be yet another year that you don’t get your breakfast in bed.

It’s a possibility, that the flowers that your spouse ordered “didn’t come in on time”

Or moreover your kids say happy mothers day and keep going in their day to day life.

 

Although it is this Sunday, I knew I had to write this weeks blog on one of the most influential people in my life. Since I am travelling to Chicago on Sunday for business, I’ll be unable to tell her just how much she means to me, so hopefully this covers some of it.

 

Mom,

As I begin to write this post, I think about hundreds of thousands of different things I could say to you, but none seem to cover exactly how important you are to me.

I can write about how you patched me up when I scraped my knee or brought me to the hospital when I split open my chin.

I could list off the ways you taught me to be around others and the mannerisms it involves or simply that positivity will never go out of style.

I could condemn you for never letting me climb one branch higher on the tree or write about how making my bed never seemed to make any sense.

I could easily talk about all the times that you’ve taken me shopping just because the new styles were in and you didn’t want me to be misplaced among my peers or how I still can’t figure out why you had me and my brother in matching outfits for the majority of our childhood.

I could talk about the trips we’ve taken, the sites we’ve seen, and the travel bug instilled in me or simply the places that we’ve yet to go.

I could talk about how somehow your stubborn ways taught me to want to lead an organic lifestyle or how your emphasis on health has helped mold me into who I am today.

I could talk about how you pushed me to study one more question when studying for SAT’s or how you commanded excellence when in came to school.

I could surely talk about a lot and I’ve probably only scratched the surface of things I could cover, but there’s one area I simply can’t even put into words properly. You have made me into the young man I am today by sacrificing every bit of your life to me and Jay’s betterment. I write this in the most sincere and the most grateful fashion as I have never met a woman that has done so much for so little recognition. I am indebted to all that you have provided me and can say whole-heartedly that a day doesn’t go by in acknowledging how fortunate I am to have you looking over me. You may not get the recognition that you deserve, but I know some day I will show it to you.

I cannot buy you the world, I cannot give you every trip that you may want to go on, but I can say I will forever be grateful for the values and confidence you’ve instilled in me and it’s with that that I hope to re-pay you someday.

I love you and will love you for the rest of my life.

Happy Mothers Day Momma, you are one truly incredible individual.

 

“There is no such things as strangers, just friends we’ve yet to meet.”

Brant A. Wickersham