Month: April 2017

A College Seniors Final Goodbye

 

A culmination of four years ending in one day.

You flip a tassle to the opposite side and you are deemed an alumnus of your university. You sit and ponder all the things that led you to this point and begin to realize just how quickly 4 years went by.

As an incoming freshman to the University of Florida, I was required by a course to write a letter to my graduating self and I found something within it that I found interesting enough to share. I wrote “only about 10% of what you will remember from college will be your classes, the other 90% will come from the relationships you form and the people you meet.”

As my time comes closer until I walk across that stage, I have not been nostalgic, but rather have reminisced on what has brought me to where I am today. It’s true, it isn’t the classes, but the people who I have made lasting memories with that I will cherish for the entirety of my life.

However, this reminds me of a sobering reality of my time at UF. Whether it be at 11:30 PM typing frantically to turn in a paper by the 11:59 deadline or ordering pokey sticks at 2:30 AM because health is obviously the biggest priority at that time, you were alongside not only roommates or organizations that you were a part of, but with the likes of an entire student body of 50,000 plus individuals.

I experienced it briefly during my internship where I moved away for three months. It is the fade away effect. It isn’t based on anger, or disinterest, but more so just a passage of life as you graduate. I know that many of you will be intertwined with my life forevermore, but I also acknowledge that some of you will move on only ever communicating with me through subtle thumbs up or hearts on social platforms.

I urge you, beg you even, to keep in contact with those individuals that had massive impact on you. Ultimately, we are social by nature and the connections that are made in college will never be fully able to be emulated again. Understand that once you start “adulting” and get into the real world, you are not alone, you are a text, call, or FaceTime away from keeping a friendship at full blossom.

I will be eternally grateful for the impact you have had on me and what you have helped me become. Thank you, I love you, and for my final undergraduate time, Go Gators.

 

Song of the Week: I’m The One – DJ Khaled 

Check out my what I’ve been up to here: (IG)

 

“There is no such things as strangers, just friends we’ve yet to meet.”

Brant A. Wickersham

What’s The Opposite Of Sad?

99.9% of you will quickly say the opposite of sad is happy.

In reality, emotion is not a binary topic. It is fluid and not singular and can contain multiple feelings and emotions tied into one.

I’ll give you an example, when someone in your family or someone that is close to you passes away, sadness is imminent. But sadness can be countered with the idea that if the individual was suffering, whether it be mentally or physically, you know you would rather them be at peace than continue to struggle for their life. Emotion is not like a light switch in that it can be both turned on and off and that it isn’t just two sole possibilities.

There are multiple emotions that can attach to your happiness and this is what I like to call the hazy moment. Those days that nothing is wrong, but it just doesn’t feel right. Rather than becoming completely deflated by this hazy state, what I do is try to define the emotions that I experience. More often than not, I cannot attribute to what exactly causes certain negative emotions, but thinking about it and thinking out loud whether that be through writing or speaking to someone about it helps identify what is going on.

When looking at it from a macro scale, negativity is a factor in everyone’s life, but it is how we counter it that dictates how long it stays attached to us. My advice to you is this, when you experience a low in your life define your emotion and don’t think of it as a black and white feeling. Think about all aspects that contribute to it and then find the ones that are causing the greatest level of sadness or negativity. Acknowledge it, but find solace in the areas of your life that pull you away from those.

A little deeper than my normal, but I know as school begins to wrap up for many of you and work loads are getting tougher for first quarter reports or exams, it’s important to keep your mental health strong.

Happy Friday.

 

 

Song of the Week: Older – Rowlan

Check out my what I’ve been up to here: (IG)

 

“There is no such things as strangers, just friends we’ve yet to meet.”

Brant A. Wickersham

The Best Advice I’ve Ever Received

 

You work hard, but you fake hustle.

I’ll repeat that: you work hard, but you fake hustle. It shook me to my core. It infuriated me internally making my blood boil like I’ve never experienced. I mulled over the 7 words and moped in my own personal sorrows until I came to the realization that it was true. I worked to the level that others put me at. I can honestly say, most everyone does. I was caught up in hearing others say you work so hard and you do so much, how do you do it? I was convinced I was at the pinnacle of my personal ability.

Rather, when thinking more about it, I came to the realization that I was working to the level of what others deemed busy or what others considered hard work. I completely disregarded my personal belief on how much I could accomplish because I took the words of what is perceived as normal.

This statement was like a light switch, a fire under my ass, or the smack in the face of simple reality. My perception of workload was dependent on what I perceive as busy, not what others think. This semester, I challenged myself to work even harder and work until I made myself sick. I took on 15 credits for my Senior Spring, I worked full time with a digital marketing agency managing over 11 profiles at one point executing day to day posts and analyzing the field from a macro sense in ways in which to improve their individual platforms totaling around 60 hours a week of work, and also still held my job as a busboy cleaning dishes and serving food at AOII at UF.

I thought nothing of it until someone noted from the outside what I was doing. Mind this, they are over 30 years old and employed full time by the University of Florida. I was asked “how in the world are you doing all of this while being in classes and still being involved?” and my answer was far clearer than I had ever imagined it would be.

I am a machine. I know and understand that I am destined for greatness, but attribute future successes to my ability to work harder than anyone around me. When I was told I faked my hustle, I’ve had an inner battle against my own mental state and my physical body convincing both that I am able anything I want to accomplish.

At times, it’s lonely. I spend long hours behind my phone and behind my computer typing pages and pages figuring out what to accomplish or do next. It’s cost me time from friends, less time being spent in social scenarios like midtown or downtown drinking the night away, but I understand it is a part of the process.

I want to thank you one thousand times over for being a part of my process and seeing and encouraging what is to come. Here’s to Friday. Crush it.

 

Song of the Week: Bambi – Jidenna

Check out my what I’ve been up to here: (IG)

 

“There is no such things as strangers, just friends we’ve yet to meet.”

Brant A. Wickersham

Choice Vs. Necessity

 

You are forced to grow when life is at its toughest points.

These points bring up the option of choice and necessity. When presented with a choice, we have the ability to sit on it and ponder what would happen if we waited (check out my thoughts on waiting longer than 48 hours here: 48 Hour Rule). Think of an assignment or a task in your workplace that is out 2 weeks from now and you have free time at this instant. Many people are not willing to work on something that has the opportunity to be worked on later. As humans, we tend to run on deadlines and put in both extra effort and more focused attention when the deadline approaches.

In contrast, imagine being able to run at this speed at all times. Executing with tenacity and doing so far in advance of any deadlines present. This in itself is the primary means for personal growth. It is what you do in the crunch time when you are forced to make a decision that dictates your outcome whether it be successful or not.

Place yourself into these situations, role play if needed, but understand that this is the area where your discomfort and your ability to problem solve is most shown. I quickly relate this to the job search and the stressors that come along with it. I see it often within my friends and even within myself. You begin with an intent to aim at the highest peak and won’t settle for anything else, but deadlines approach and you hadn’t worked on your resume or researched the company enough and are pushed to the aside as ill prepared or undervalued. Think if it were the crunch period months before and how much more willing you’d be to prep and get ready for what is being thrown at you.

I will assure you this, the more you push off your personal deadlines and the more you wait on yourself the more dissatisfied you will be. We thrive in situational uncomfortability meaning that when we are placed into situations that we don’t necessarily know what the outcome will be, we work harder to get through it or over it.

It is your choice in what you want your life to look like, but it is not a necessity to make it into what you want. Make your dreams or your opportunities into necessities and you will be forced to work on those every day and think about them every day.

Happy Friday as always, wishing you all the very best. Here’s to a prosperous and action driven weekend.

 

Song of the Week: Khalid – Location

Check out my what I’ve been up to here: (IG)

 

“There is no such things as strangers, just friends we’ve yet to meet.”

Brant A. Wickersham